The Immaculate Void by Brian Hodge

Author:Brian Hodge
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-77148-438-1
Publisher: ChiZine Publications
Published: 2018-04-17T00:00:00+00:00

Bianca wasn’t supposed to make it so easy on me, the weird bitch. I blurt out the most threatening thing I’ve ever told anyone, and what does she come back with? No Fuck you, Daphne. No You can walk home from here and never come near me again, Daphne. No What color do you like your restraining orders in, Daphne? That’s how normal people are supposed to react.

Me, all I got was a lame Well, I’d rather you not murder me, but if it has to happen, I could live with it if it was you doing the murdering.

In so many words.

What a bizarre place to go forward from. Dwelling on it, imagining it happening, as a mental exercise. It’s the kind of shared sickness that brings BFFs together.

How would you like to be done in, my luscious friend? Would you prefer it quick and painless, or would you like your killer to make a bold, splashy statement?

Gosh, I never gave it any real thought before. There sure are a lot of options, aren’t there? Shooting’s always good, for a start.

We could . . . but don’t you find that too easy? Detached, even? It’s not very personal. It’s like using a remote control. I could kill you from across the room.

You could kill me from across the playground, too. And doing it while all the kids and the normal, boring, non-amphibian moms are watching? That’s a statement.

Yeah, but still. I move one finger and you’re gone. It’s lazy.

What about knives, then? That opens up a range of possibilities, from surgical precision to wild, unhinged frenzy.

You’d really be okay with that? That would have to hurt.

It would, but it’s so much more personal.

It would really force a commitment, wouldn’t it? I’d have to see it through, start to finish, and I’m not totally sure I could. I can’t promise you I wouldn’t lose my nerve.

Oh, so you walk away crying and leave me lying there on the ground, and maybe I bleed out and maybe I don’t? What a selfish thing to do.

But you’re so aesthetically pleasing, and maybe you’ve got issues, but I think you’re a good person. How do I carve that up?

Then what about hitting me with something? Hit me hard enough in the right spot, with the right thing, and I might not even know the rest of it was happening.

Blunt object?

Or worse.

Well . . . the previous guy in my life, Attila? He has some battle-axes. Yeah. Real, honest-to-god, no-shit, battle-axes. The beauty of going that route is that I could totally wimp out after only two or three whacks, but there’s so much damage already . . .

That sounds great! You think he’d let you borrow one?

I can’t imagine anything that would make him happier. I suspect he’s thought about using them on somebody for a long time. Like, thought about it a lot. And you know? I wouldn’t bet my life he hasn’t already.

You’re joking.

I wish I was.

Where does someone like you meet a guy like that? A biker bar?

At the museum, actually.

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